Since becoming a homeschooler and as such, a member of a fantastic homeschool community, I have come to the realization that concurrent, alternate universes exist.  I know this for a fact, since I currently have a foot in two of them.

There is the universe that revolves around how you appear to society-the send your child to preschool, then to public school, don’t question the system and sign them up for as many after school programs as possible because god forbid they don’t make the cheerleading squad/go to Harvard/play varsity baseball in 10-15 years.   Instead of signing up to bring dinners to those in need/whose family is sick/having a baby/etc, you sign up to bring dinners to those who just had a boob job and tummy tuck.    Conversations with other Moms around the water cooler are often about the best style of 100 dollar jeans to buy, how “fat” everyone is(although they are skinny skinny skinny).  Many of the children all have more “things” than anyone could want but not enough of what they really need.  They rarely say please and thank you, and my 5 year old preschooler has better manners and a longer attention span than many older children. 

Before I really knew about homeschooling, I spent years trying to assimilate into this universe.  Even tho the moral consciousness of this universe did not feel right, I thought I was the one who didn’t know what she was doing and whose ideals were “wrong”.  After all, everyone else thought these things were a necessity.  I tried hard and did what I was supposed to do….sent my child to school, talked about what cosmetic surgery I would like in a few years.  But it never felt right.

When I found my homeschool community, it was an amazing thing.  I never knew there were parents out there like me, who didn’t buy their kid something every time they went to the store, used the word “no” and actually enjoyed being with their children.  I met people who cared about the environment, whose needs were not fueled with keeping up with the Jones’.  And I liked this universe.  It felt like “home” to me.  Its where people don’t do a double take when they find out I homeschool and say “I could never be around my child all day every day.  You must be a saint!”  I can actually talk about composting and recycling and downsizing and simplifying and people GET it.  People understand what it is to have to economize, and instead of a push to purchase something on credit I hear what they are doing to economize as well.  Noone bemoans how poor they are while sipping their daily Starbucks at their weekly nail appointment.  There is much less hypocrisy in this world.

I may sound like I am judging one universe and finding it lacking–on the contrary, it fits many people, and fits them well.  It is a place where they find like minded individuals to talk about what they care about.  Its just a universe that I no longer want to be a large part of.  I will always have friends there–people who don’t quite fit into that universe but  fear leaving it for another one, since that is all they know.

I, on the other hand, am counting down the months until my commitments in that universe are at an end, and I can stay in the one in which I fit.